Welcome

Nov. 25th, 2025 08:25 pm
anxiousgeek: (Default)

anxiousgeek

writing is public. life not so much
Check Out My Intro

Patreon
- writing wlw and non-binary characters.

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Social
tumblr // twitter // instagram // facebook // pillowfort 

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Fanfiction
[archiveofourown.org profile] anxiousgeek // [fanfiction.net profile] anxiousgeek 

 
Transformative Policy

You do not need to ask my permission to podfic, translate and create art for any fanwork I have posted. Please include a link back to the work on A03 and let me know so I can see it! I want to see what you did!

I don't give permission for remixes or sequels without a conversation - so message me or email me (theanxiousgeek@gmail.com)

Baby Book

Mar. 30th, 2019 08:06 pm
anxiousgeek: (Bi pixel heart)
 Something that has always really bugged me is that Phineas doesn't have a baby book.  I never wanted a standard one - though I probably should've just sucked it up and got one. You can get inclusive ones for same-sex parents - but I wanted to do it my way, with more photos and pages I can put poetry I've written for him. 

I started one - two actually - but the cover never quite worked out and they both look awful now. I'm not sure why I've not had this problem before but for some reason both the drawings on the cover directly and the paper version I attached to the cover both got washed out. I protected them but it just didn't work and now they look awful.

And with everything that's gone on over the past year, it wasn't a priority or something that really motivated me. It just bugged me.

But now things have calmed down, and I've been paid, I'm going to try again. 

I've got a smaller scrapbook 8x8 instead of the A4, and got out the all the bits I was using for the old one - plus the first attempts. I have some washi tape though I've never used it before - it was free though - and some rainbow gradient craft paper and I'm going for it.

Right now, I got all the bits out.

Here goes nothing.

anxiousgeek: (Default)
 Nicked off [personal profile] shipperslist  who nicked it off DW. Original over at BlanketBoxBox.

 

Rules: Go to your AO3 works page, expand all the filters, and answer the following questions!

 

What’re your first and second most common work ratings?

Explicit (135)

General Audiences (113)

 

What’s your most common archive warning? Least common?

No Archive Warnings Apply (367)

Character Death (1)
 

Do you consider yourself an adventurous writer?

Not really. I stick to what I know when it comes to fanfiction lol. Porn and fluff. 

 

How many stories have you made in each pairing category?

  • F/M (215)
  • F/F (132)
  • Gen (35)
  • Multi (14)
  • M/M (7)
  • Other (1)

I wasn't sure what the Other was and it's my Sam Carter/Thor fic
 

What are your top 4 fandoms by numbers?

  • Stargate SG-1 (131)
  • Dragon Age (Video Games) (54)
  • Stargate Atlantis (50)
  • House M.D. (37)
     

Are you still active in any of them, and do you tend to migrate a lot?

Still writing a lot of Dragon Age fic. I get the urge to write Stargate fic from time to time. I'm surprised I wrote that much House fic tbh. 
 

What are your top 4 relationship tags?
 

  • Samantha "Sam" Carter/Jack O'Neill (45)
  • Pepper Potts/Tony Stark (20)
  • Rodney McKay/Elizabeth Weir (12)
  • Ninth Doctor/Rose Tyler (11)

 

Does this match how you feel about the characters, or are you puzzled?

I'm surprised other pairings aren't higher, like from Dragon Age, but I am a multi-shipper and I will write anything. I'm not surprised about the Sam/Jack. First ship.
 

What are your top 2 most used additional tags, and your bottom 2?

 

  • Romance (153)
  • Angst (135)
  • Alternative  Universe (12)
  • Masterbation (6)
     

What would happen if you combined all 4 of these into a fic?

I could do that. Something in SG-1 maybe. Or Trek. Voyager fic. There is definitely a fic with three of those four.
 

How many WIPs do you have currently running on AO3? Any you don’t plan on finishing?

I only have one WIP on A03 - A Leliana/F!Amell AU that I've never finished. I want to rewrite it completely.

anxiousgeek: (Default)
 When the walls fell

I still loved you

stepping on broken glass

around the bricks and mortar

crunch and crack of feet

as I head towards you

push past crowds

the screams that scared me

into finding you

but do not deter.

There are reasons

to run or

to stop and stare

at the carnage we reeked upon ourselves

but I only had

to be worth something to you

even as the city tumbled

and we lost everything.

I still loved you.

That's all there was.

 

r.l.w

Letter

Mar. 24th, 2019 09:44 pm
anxiousgeek: (Default)
 So, hello human who will right me femslash.

I really like smut but I will read anything you write me. I love Josephine. I love rare pairings. I love all femslash. I like humour, romance, drama, angst if there is a happy ending, aus... It's actually easier to tell you what not to write. 

No heavy BDSM. I don't mind some light BDSM.
No self harm. Or suicide. 
No watersports or scat.
No high school AUs. 
No non-con. No mentions of non-con. No dub-con.

For the Inquisitors/Wardens/Hawkes:

I'm happy with most versions and names (though nothing overly weird) but I do have things I prefer.

Josephine/F!Trevelyan - I like warrior Trevelyan who wields a greatsword.

No mage Adaars.

Purple Hawke. 

Any wardens. 





Abercon

Mar. 24th, 2019 11:48 am
anxiousgeek: (LGBTQ star)
  

Mencap Ceredigion (a learning disability charity) ran a con in the arts centre in Aberystwyth on Saturday with a relaxed screening of Kiki's Delivery Service. So we decided to take Phineas for his first cinema trip. 

 

The con was fun, they had some booths and I bought us all a pin. Phineas chose his own, it says I am enough. He also chose a black and green di. He was a little scared because there were more people there than he's used to but after a little while he was okay and wanted to go and find the person who had come as their fursona. 

The screening of KiKi's Delivery Service was really good, we also got to see a Welsh made short called Cumulus which was really good. Both organisers of the con spoke a little, the creative director was convinced no one would come - she was dressed as KiKi.

Phineas was so well behaved. We got end seats in case he needed a break but he just sat and watched the whole thing. He wasn't heavy enough to keep his seat down so he sat on either of our laps, ate his snacks and watched the film. He chatted a little, pointed out cars and played with his car too. 

He's only 2 years and 8 months, I think most people wait a little longer I think but it seemed like a good opportunity. He really enjoyed the film too, he likes Ponyo a lot, and Spirited Away. When he came home he started walking around with a broom pole we have in the house. 

It was a really good day and now the sun is shining. 

anxiousgeek: (Default)
  

My aunt found some more pictures of my grandparents.  These are my paternal grandparents. My nan drank a bottle of sherry a day. My gramps, my gramps was amazing. I still miss him, he died about 9 years ago and I think about him a lot.

Everyone called him Bill, even my nan. His name was not Bill. It was a Welsh thing, lots of the older generation around here go by middle or surnames.

We were close, he was my hero and defender. We were both insomniacs and would sit up at night drinking tea and talking. Sometimes he would do a crossword while I wrote. He told me about his parents, living in London between the Wars, his job. He was born outside Newport Wales, but lived his adult life in London then Coventry. he was a Royal Marine's Engineer but he never talked about the war. I know he was stationed in Orkney for a while but not much else. 

He was a good man, kind and generous. He would play the Irish Lottery and give me and my sister some of the winnings. Sometimes he would tell us to come upstairs and get a sweet as a pretext to give us a fiver without my dad or nanna knowing. 

He loved my mum a lot, and her sisters and talked to them long after my parents split up. He was more civil to my stepdad than my dad ever was. 

He had no feeling in his right hand after an accident cleaning the glass doors in the house. He shook a lot and when he died they thought he might have had undiagnosed Parkinsons all this time. He couldn't do little things like tie his shoelaces and I was always sad because in term time my sister and I weren't there to do that for him. I would rub Deep Heat into his back for him even though I am badly allergic to it. 

He had dementia for the last decade of his life, and lived in a home because my nanna and dad couldn't look after him. My nan was diabetic at this point and losing the feeling in her feet and my dad is an alcoholic epileptic with Parkinson's. They couldn't look after him but to my dad's credit, he did go and visit once a week at least. 

The last time I saw him, he recognised me and my sister but only intermittently. It was heartbreaking. I cried for the rest of the day. I still cry thinking about it.

My nan went to visit him once. He had been there for nine years and asked my dad one day to take her. A week later she slipped into a diabetic coma, had two strokes and passed away. It was a Friday. My gramps died six months later, also on a Friday. 

I wish he could've seen the person I've become. The things I've done. Wish he could meet my wife, they're very similar in ways, hard workers, same interests, kind and generous. He would've loved her. And I wish he could've met my kid. 

He was a good man and I miss him, terribly, still. And always will.

anxiousgeek: (Isabela)
Title: The Talk


Rating: Adult

Summary: Bethany gives her own shovel talk.

Notes:  I was on a Bethany binge and got really fed up of the amount of controlling Garret Hawkes there were threatening anyone Bethany has sex with. That shit is messed up. A response. ~1500 words

Patreon // Ko-Fi

Read on A03.org

anxiousgeek: (Isabela)
 

Title: Stacks Of Criminality

Rating: T

Summary: Aveline is attracted to the starring role of her quarterly crime report and also her backup.

Notes: Never written Aveline before. Not sure I’ve gotten her quite right. ~2100 words.

Ko-Fi // Patreon

Read on a03.org

anxiousgeek: (she-ra/Katra)
 Title: Birthday Card

Rating: G

Summary: Adora finds a card in her room.

Notes: Adora's birthday is the 19th January so I wrote this. ~1700 words.

Ko-Fi // Patreon

Read on A03.org

anxiousgeek: (Josephine)

I’m going to try and put together my thoughts on Writer’s Apathy vs Writer’s Block.

I’ve always considered Writer’s Block to be the inability in knowing what to write. For me it’s not knowing what to write, what words to write next, being stuck – whether it’s stuck on the plot, paragraph or a word. It’s about not having ideas. Whether those ideas are at the start, middle or end of a project. Writer’s Block is about being stuck. It’s in the name. Writer’s Block. Whatever it is in your brain that creates your words and worlds is being blocked and you are unable to create.

I tend to suffer more from Writer’s Apathy.

Writer’s Apathy is more about not wanting to write even though you know what to write.

I am full of ideas. They’re spilling me at the moment and I’m as prolific as I ever have been in terms of writing. In the second half of 2018, I wrote forty-eight fanfics and eight original pieces. I still have counted how many poems I wrote last year, though I tend to write the most of them during NaPoWriMo and OctPoWriMo.

I’m writing a lot right now.

Between July 2017 and July 2018, I didn’t write any fiction. I kept my blog – Queer Little Family – up and wrote some personal essays but no fiction. And I had plenty of ideas, most of which just got shelved until I started writing fiction again. The ideas are always there.

The desire to write them is not.

Sometimes I just can’t write. But not because there is a block or I’m stuck. It’s because I don’t want to write. I don’t care enough to write. The dictionary definition of apathy is “lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern,” and this definitely sums up my feelings sometimes.

Writer’s Apathy is a lack of interest in writing despite the fact that you love it. Despite the fact that you are a writer. It can be all encompassing and you lose enthusiasm for all writing, every genre and fandom you normally write for. Or it can be specific. For the last couple of months, I lost all interest in writing for Queer Little Family despite the fact I have spent three years building it up to be a relatively small but successful blog. I just didn’t care and it’s only recently I’ve been posting there again and making the effort. The same goes for the lack of fiction and fanfiction last year.

There are different layers to it, different reasons why I have lost interest or enthusiasm on any given day. It’s definitely tied to my depression. Much like my depression and anxiety, there is often no reason why I just don't want to write. Even though at night I’m mulling the ideas over in my head to the point I can’t sleep or daydreaming fanfiction on the bus to work. Actually sitting down to write is just more than I can take on some days.

The blank page, the blinking cursor, they’re all synonymous with both Writer’s Block and Writer’s Apathy. Both taunt and torture. But with Writer’s Block there is desire but no words, with Writer’s Apathy there are words but no desire.

I’ve had people say they think they suffer from Writer’s Apathy too whenever I mention it but I’ve never really explained what that meant, or at least what it means to me. I hope this helps and it certainly helped sort through the thoughts in my head.

Perhaps Writer’s Block isn’t what you're suffering from right now? Perhaps it’s Writer’s Apathy.


Fic

Jan. 24th, 2019 10:38 pm
anxiousgeek: (Josephine)
Title: I say let the world go to hell, but I should always have my tea. 

Rating: T

Pairing: Josephine/F!Hawke

Summary: Hawke met Josephine once before. 

Notes: I didn't quite expect this fic to turn out like this or for there to be so much tea. Originally written for the  pre-cannon square of my ladiesbingo card but not sure it actually fits. ~6500 words. ~6500 litres of tea.

Ko-Fi // Patreon

Read it on A03.org 

anxiousgeek: (Default)
 

Look at all that green!

I had a really good week as you can see with three +1000 word days. I broke 15,000 words too and I’m about 600 words ahead of my target so that’s pretty awesome. Means I could slow down a little and spend some time on a new project LGBTQIA+ Writers on twitter and sorting my poetry.

I did a lot of writing during word sprints in the Weekend Writing Marathon discord server. They have a schedule of 1k1hr sprints and also you can do your own extra sprints in between. It really helped.

The 17th was a Thursday, not a weekend day like it might seem. I tend not to be writing any more or any less at the weekends, because those are my days with my kid. So I do bits and bobs during the day sometimes but mostly I write in the evening after he’s gone to bed like the rest of the week.

Anyway, this week I finally finished my Josephine/F!Hawke fic – completed word count 6579. Available only my patreon at the moment.

Made progress on the Witches story now called Winter’s Burn and posted the first part on Patreon. Currently sitting at 4498 words

The poll for which fanfic to write next resulted in a tie between She-Ra and Aveline/Isabela so I’ve started both.

And I wrote another poem you've already seen!

 
anxiousgeek: (Default)
I miss doing this stuff a lot - so this one is from [community profile] 100prompts 

001.First kiss002.Final003.Numb004.Broken wings005.Melody
006.Rules007.Chocolate008.Nostalgia009.Heartbeat010.Stranger
011.Confusion012.Bitter013.Afterlife014.Daybreak015.Audience
016.Endless sorrow017.Fireworks018.Wishing019.Happy birthday to you020.Tomorrow
021.Oppression022.Agony023.Return024.Protection025.Boxes
026.Hope027.Preparation028.Beautiful029.Lies030.Underneath
031.Hide032.Diary033.Unforeseen034.Conditional035.Gone
036.Clear skies037.Heartache038.Wired039.Insanity040.Foolish
041.Words042.Study043.Punctual044.Piggybank045.Shooting star
046.Writer's Choice047.Writer's Choice048.Writer's Choice049.Writer's Choice050.Writer's Choice

anxiousgeek: (Default)
 I have a public poll up on my Patreon to decide what fanfiction I should write next. Choices are from Dragon Age, She-Ra and MCU. All femslash. Go check it out and vote.

Word Count

Jan. 17th, 2019 11:13 pm
anxiousgeek: (Default)
 Mostly thanks to the [community profile] weekendwritingmarathon I've written over 2,000 words this evening and finally finished my Josephine/F!Hawke fanfic which involves a lot of tea. It's patreon only atm until next week. 
anxiousgeek: (Default)
I hit 10,000 words yesterday.

I actually didn’t think I was going to make my word count for the day, as I was feeling awful, mentally, but I wrote some of my fanfiction and somehow hit the 548 words and then some.

So I am well over the target, which is good cause there are definitely going to be days where I won’t have time to write, or I just won’t feel like writing.

I suffer from writer’s apathy, rather than writer’s block, something I may talk about in the future.

Here is the word count for the week:

A table of my word counts for the week 8th to the 14th.
My word counts for the week.

As you can see, Tryslora has fixed the colours on the actual word/day and I made it teal.

Here’s what I’ve written:

  • unfinished fairy fic – now at 4049 words
  • unfinished Josephine/F!Hawke Dragon Age fanfiction – now at 3981 words
  • started a witch story – 468 words
  • a poem – below – 65 words
  • this blog post on this website – 284 words
  • and the She-Ra fanfiction I wrote last week is on A03 now – Nine Nights In
anxiousgeek: (she-ra/Katra)
 Title: Nine Nights In

Rating: G

Pairing: Mild She-Ra/Catra, She-Ra/Glimmer but not overly either.

Summary:  The first night Adora wakes up with Catra on the end her bed, she throws her out.

Notes: I'm taking part in the Snowflake Challenge, and day seven was to do something new. So here is She-Ra fanfiction. 479 words.

Ko-Fi // Patreon

Read @ A03.org

anxiousgeek: (Iron Man - Pepper  - bullet holes)
 

I'm not doing day 12 as I'm still trying to decide what my next big patreon project will be.

But Day 13 is something I've already decided upon. I've mentioned it a million times before but I've pledged to write 200,000 words this year at Get Your Words Out (pledges for 2019 end on the 15th by the way). 

Broken down my goals for each month are like this:

I also want to write and finish a novel this year too. 

Other goals include - make new friends and solidify the newer friendships with Kate and Emma I made in 2018. Learn to drive. Have another kid. Get a permanent contact at WWDAS. Grow my patreon

anxiousgeek: (non binary speech bubble)
 

I was making writer badges for my store and turned one into a postcard, which I think may be a slightly threatening thing to get through the post lol. I do have the small versions of the writer ones for badges/icons which I will post but here is what I've put up on the shop so far. If anyone has any requests let me know.

I want to do some reading/book quotes too on another base.


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